Review - Kill The Moon

The Doctor reaches a pinnacle of patronising crankiness as Clara faces the truth about just how different he's become in Kill The Moon.

Season 8, Episode 8 - Kill The Moon

The cold open drops us right into the action here, building a hook to suck us straight in. Unfortunately Clara's message to Earth just struck me as a bit forced. We're then flung straight back to the real beginning of the story, where Courtney Woods is insinuating herself on The Doctor, aiming to go on further trips through Time and Space.

Here's where we run into the first thing I found odd about this episode. Despite his new crotchety demeanour, I still don't buy The Doctor telling someone they're not special. Despite his regeneration, this is still the same man who once said "You know that in nine hundred years of time and space I've never met anybody who wasn't important before." Of course The Doctor is now claiming over 2,000 years of life, so perhaps he's gotten a bit more jaded since then. Or maybe it was supposed to be another lesson.

Like "don't listen to men in polka-dot shirts."

The overall concept here was fairly sound, I suppose. The Moon being an egg was an interesting idea, but some of the details seemed a little glossed over. Lots of questions remain unanswered, or at least not suitably answered to keep me suspending my disbelief.

The Germs were suitably scary, but why did they look like spiders and spin webs if they were supposed to be single celled organisms? A bit of a redesign would have helped here, making them appear more simple. Another option could be to refer to them as parasites rather than germs. I'm not sure how (if at all) that would affect the scene where Courtney started floating or using the spray to kill them, but neither of those really made much sense either, so maybe the whole lot could just go. Whatever the solution, I can't buy a "unicellular" organism having such an advanced structure.

Even a basic knowledge of biology says this is not a germ.

Why had the creature growing in the Moon only begun to distort gravity relatively recently? The moon has been there for millions of years, presumably with the creature growing inside the whole time. Why then does the weight gain only start causing issues on Earth some time in the next 30 years? Was it dormant until recently? How exactly does the creature fit inside the moon, but have a greater density than it?

How exactly were the astronauts planning on using the nukes to destroy the Moon? They had no idea it was a living thing inside the moon that was causing the trouble, and they have no drilling equipment to get the nukes sufficiently deep in the crust. Hell, they don't even have a lander, so couldn't evenly space the bombs to get maximum effect without manually hauling them across the lunar landscape.

And the biggest question of all, how the hell did the creature manage to lay an egg? First up, how did something that just came from inside the moon manage to lay another egg the same size as the moon? Is the creature growing within the new moon simply non-sexual, or is this some kind of immaculate conception?

Biologically possible, but probably VERY uncomfortable.

Putting all this aside, the episode had good pacing and handled the morality issue reasonably well despite the flaws in the voting system (only half the world could vote and governments could rig it by cutting all power grids). It was entertaining despite the plot holes, and it had a total lack of my usual gripes, with bonus absence of a blatant Season Arc reference. Still, I think a slightly different angle could close those plot holes and make this episode a beauty. 

7/10

Can we fix it?

As I said, yes we can, and all it takes is a rethink of the egg concept. Rather than an egg, I think a better solution would be a nest.

First up though, we need to clear up the whole spider = germ thing. Rather than rebadge what they have as a parasite to make it biologically more accurate, I'd rather go with a redesign of the monster.  Instead of legs, it has flagellum. We can even give it eight of them so that in dim lighting we get the impression of a spider. Instead of a toothy maw, we have a mass of pili which, again, in poor light appear to be teeth. The webs could be explained away as some kind of excretion like a snail trail which aids mobility. All of this allows us to initially play on that all so prevalent arachnaphobia whilst retaining some semblance of biological realism.

With that sorted, we can tidy up the issues surrounding the gravity and the new moon. I reckon I can fix that all up with a couple of tweaks to the creature and how it breeds.

I see this creature as something inter-dimensional. The moon is part egg, part nest. Within the shell of the moon is the opening to a pocket dimension where the foetus grows. As it matures, it begins emerging from the pocket dimension, causing the seismic activity and a huge leakage of amniotic fluid with it's accompanying bacteria. The huge creature begins to cause gravity to increase quickly as it shifts more of itself into this dimension.

Upon emerging fully from its extra-dimensional egg-sac, the creature's first instinct is to build a new nest from the scattered remains of the old one. First it fabricates a new pocket dimension, then covers it with the pieces of the moon, tying it all together with silk-like strands. Then it flies off to find a mate, destined to return who knows when and somehow deposit it's fertilized egg safely in the pocket dimension through the moon.

Who knows how many times this cycle happened before recorded human history. It could even be tied in to the extinction of the dinosaurs.The creature that emerged then didn't manage to catch all of the pieces of the moon when making it's new nest.

Much of the first part could be explained by The Doctor upon his return from his little amniotic swim. The rest would layout to some explanation as they watch from Earth.

An interesting twist would be to have humanity's interest in space exploration kindled by a desire to protect this extremely rare breeding ground.

Closing those couple of plot holes would elevate this episode from an entertaining episode that makes me cringe at the poor science, to a near perfect story.