Review - The Magician's Apprentice

Season 9 kicks off in spectacular style as The Doctor faces one of his oldest nemeses in The Magician's Apprentice.

Season 9, Episode 1 - The Magician's Apprentice

I sat and watched tentatively as this episode began, the foul taste of Season 8's final episodes still fresh in my mind. "Don't be crap," I thought as a war-torn alien landscape trapped a young boy, and The Doctor showed up to save him. Nothing offensive yet, but nothing particularly reassuring either. Then The Doctor asks who the boy is, and the answer he gets literally made me call out, "Oh-HO!"

"I am your father!"

With that cold open, the bar had been set and the stakes had been raised. Now I was really worried, because if it was crap, it would hurt all the more.

We soon discover The Doctor is being pursued by a robed roller-blader with a severe skin condition, who had tracked him through a handful of locations referencing previous seasons. His a message for The Doctor is that Davros has remembered something, and this revelation clearly sends The Doctor on a bit of a downer.

Then we cut to Clara at Coal Hill, teaching her students all about her apparent lesbian fling with Jane Austin, for some reason. Quite apart from this unnecessary In-Who-Endo, it now seems that everyone is cool with Clara casually receiving calls from secret military organisations at work and running out on her job at a second's notice. Either way we end up at UNIT HQ investigating why every plane on earth has become frozen in time.

Sadly it is nothing but a ruse by Missy, who delightfully doesn't even bother explaining why she isn't dead. In some ways I loved that, but it could also be seen as very lazy. Now I know The Master is pretty crazy now, and I understand we are still meant to see Missy as a bad guy, but randomly disintegrating people seems particularly psychopathic. Her interplay with Clara is nice though. I liked the way she reveals the concept of a Confession Dial, The Doctor's last will and testament. The big let-down that it wasn't for Clara was kind of telegraphed, but still had a nice pay off.

"You ain't no thang."

After some techno-babble, the ladies find The Doctor a few hundred years in the past having an "axe battle." I will admit, it was really fun watching The Doctor rock out, and the dodgy jokes were glorious, but this section chewed up a lot of time, making it feel that not much actually happens this episode. Lumpy-face turns up again, and after a demonstration of his snake powers, we have some kind of Mexican stand-off and The Doctor is coerced into following Snakes McGee to where Davros sits dying.

Then we get treated to another one of those God-awful disguised Daleks. Ugh! I hate, hate, hate them. They look stupid and go against everything the Daleks stand for.

"When they tell you not to run in the toffee apple factory, let me tell you, you don't run."

The stealth planet was an okay device, although the "you can see it once you've been here a while" was a bit of a stretch. Why was Davros' place not stealthed too? How did they get from outer space into atmosphere without feeling it? Not a big deal, but one of those things that can grate if the rest of the episode isn't good enough to help you ignore it. Gladly that isn't the case here.

I liked that they pulled some more archival footage to tie this into the Classic Who stuff. And I absolutely loved showing us Four's line from Genesis of the Daleks which forms the whole premise of this episode. And that leaves us with a delightful cliff-hanger that revisits that very question, asking if The Doctor has changed enough to answer differently this time.

"Sarah Connor?"

It's tough to rate this one, because it's only part one of a two-parter, but on the face of it, I liked it. Missy continues to irk me, but I must admit that this episode had her growing on me. I also note with interest the apparently abandonment of the Sonic Screwdriver. Could it be this spells the end of Deus Ex Screwdriver? It would be an interesting path to take, especially as it gives up a solid merchandising stream. Most likely The Doctor will just build another one when all this is over, but I'm interested to see where they take it. Part two may see me want to retroactively reassess my opinion of this story, but now I'm going to call it a winner. 

9/10

Can we fix it?

Not much to do here, especially in the second half, but the opening could use a couple of tweaks.

Firstly, Clara's call-up to UNIT, needs a review. I wasn't a fan of her commanding her students to whip out their phones and start searching for news on the planes. I'd prefer to have that scene cut down to just have her circle the plane on the window. Sure, the Headmaster can come in at that point and say she has a call, but rather than Clara jump in with, "that'll be UNIT," we instead hear that her mother has been taken ill. Clara would looked perplexed for a second before the Headmaster tells her, "they're trying to get in contact with her doctor," at which point Clara twigs, makes her apologies, and bolts. Things play out the same from there.

The way I see it, The Master / Missy may be insane, but randomly killing people and bragging about windowing his wife is a bit OTT. The Master was originally Doctor Who's version of Loki. Power-hungry and convinced of his superiority to other life forms. The crazy should be manifesting as unpredictability and mood swings rather than malicious murder. 

With that in mind a slight tweak to Clara and Missy's interaction. We should be treated to a glimpse at Missy's point of view here. When Clara talks of Missy going good, Missy looks confused. "I've always been good," she says, "just not your good." Missy could still kill those guys, but rather than brag about how mean she is being to show how she is totally a bad guy still, I swear, she talks about how it's not evil because humans are primitive. A parallel of Loki's ant/boot metaphor would be nice. A particularly cheeky thing would be for her to use it verbatim, prefacing it by saying "A great man once said..."

These are minor quibbles though. Overall it was top notch.

Review - The Doctor Dances

The Empty Child drew me in and put me on the edge of my seat, and now it's time for a good, hard, emotional kick to the guts with the story's conclusion, The Doctor Dances.

Season 1, Episode 10 - The Doctor Dances

The dialogue between Jack, Rose and The Doctor is a particular highlight. Say what you (or I) will about Steven Moffat as show runner, the man can write great dialogue. We learn a lot about Jack and get some interesting hints at the Time Agency. Jack really had a lot of potential as an ongoing companion. Again, I didn't watch Torchwood, but Jack was a lot of fun when he showed up in Doctor Who, and I think he set a nice dynamic with The Doctor and Rose.

"Well, I've got a banana and, in a pinch, you could put up some shelves."

The In-Who-Endo continues this episode with Mr Lloyd exposed as "having it off" with the butcher, Algie is confirmed as gay and we have The Doctor's revelation of humanity's future pan-sexuality. Taken in isolation, this story is almost entirely about sexual tolerance. Not only do we have the aforementioned In-Who-Endos which juxtapose each other through how the same behaviour is tolerated across time periods, but Nancy's status as a teenage single mother and the apparent social pressure to lie about it was the cause of a lot of the trouble.

Using the euphemism of Dancing was a good choice, as it keeps the show family friendly whilst at the same time subtly introducing that theme of acceptance and inclusiveness to all audiences. As great as this message is to get out there, it doesn't need to happen all the time, Steven. I'm going to look at this episode in isolation of the future occurrences and not judge it harshly because of the In-Who-Endo.

Not Safe For Work

There's a lot of interplay between Jack and The Doctor about the Sonic, and the general consensus is that it's a fairly useless tool. Of course that's from the perspective if it being a weapon, which is fine. The Screwdriver itself is a bit inconstant throughout this story. We saw it being used as a scanner and to open locks in The Empty Child, but in this episode, whilst it can seemingly be used to reattach barbed wire (apparently by growing it), The Doctor can't use it to cut through the window bars, instead having to try to create a "resonance pattern" in the concrete.

The creepiness keeps coming, as does the witty banter, but this episode is injected with a healthy dose of heart-wrenching drama too. Florence Hoath's performance as Nancy is fantastic, and she is a huge part of the reason that this is the first (of many) Doctor Who episodes to bring a tear to my eye. The penultimate scene was masterfully crafted, with the performances, music and effects all working together to hit me right in my sense of parental protectiveness.

I've just got something in my eye.

This is yet another classic. The story as a whole is second to Dalek only because it doesn't have Daleks. Everybody loves Daleks.

10/10

Can we fix it?

As I said, there's a lot of sexual innuendo in this episode, but I'll ignore the future trend and look at that as the theme of this episode. If I was going to focus on anything here it would be the use of the Sonic Screwdriver. I'd have liked to see The Doctor explain that he was trying to create that resonance pattern in the concrete because it would be quicker than trying to cut through the bars. I'd also have liked to see the Sonic reattach the barbed wire by fusing or welding it together, rather than the wire regrowing to fill the gap. One looks like science, the other looks like magic. It's best we stay away from magic.

Either way, these are just nit-picking, and I'm happy to ignore them because the episode didn't really give me time to focus on them.

Review - The Empty Child

Season one continues to dish up the gold with the first installment of its second two-parter, The Empty Child.

Season 1, Episode 9 - The Empty Child

Of course in this, the first episode to feature Captain Jack Harkness, we have to expect a certain level of In-Who-Endo. I'm not sure, however, that all of it was necessary. That bit about red being camp? Could have done without that.

Jack's interaction with Rose is pretty full-on. We get a very clear indication of Rose's romantic intentions. I'm starting to understand her on this front a bit more as we go along. She's like a backpacker with a boyfriend back home; quite happy to put it about when she can, but still wants to keep Mickey on the bench.

Sure, we can hook up. But nothing serious. I'm fruit picking in Mildura next week.

We see the Sonic Screwdriver used quite a bit. The Doctor opens a lock with it, but then uses it to scan the patients. I suppose it could be a kind of Ultrasound maybe, but it's getting a bit Deus Ex Screwdriver.

Whilst in the hospital, we had another neat little hint at The Doctor's past and The Time War when Doctor Constantine says, "Before this war began I was a father and a grandfather. Now I'm neither, but I'm still a doctor," with The Doctor replying "Yeah, I know the feeling."

I've gotta say, "Are you my mummy?" is quite possibly the scariest line of the series. The reveal of Jamie is masterfully played out. Short and distant glimpses at the start followed by lots of voice (that line) and then when we do see him up close, he looks sort of normal. Just a boy in a mask. Sure he's creepy as hell, but still just a boy. Things only get really scary in the Hospital when we see the boy is not the whole problem, but the "plague" he is spreading.

A creepy, creepy plague

The music seemed to stand out a lot to me in this episode. Could be because there was a fair bit of tense wandering about with not a lot of dialogue. The music really helped amp up the already considerable tension.

There is something inherently disturbing about a gas mask. The blank glassy stare of the eye holes. The way the rubber meets the skin. It's entirely alien but at the same time familiar. Put one on a kid, and it evokes all kinds of terror.

Abject, pants-soiling terror

I think what I'm saying is that this episode hits horror spot on. At the same time it supports the creepiness with some nice light-hearted comedy around Rose and Jack. We are introduced to Nano Genes early and naturally, meaning the ending of The Doctor Dances is not telegraphed.

This one's a definite favourite.

10/10

Can we fix it?

Not much to do here. The only small issue is that little gay joke at the start, but other than that, it's golden.

In-Who-Endo

What is with all the sexual innuendo on Doctor Who? Even taking out the Companion love and the other Hunka hunka burning Doc situations we're still left with quite a few instances of sexual innuendo ranging from fairly innocent to Carry On.

I would watch the hell out of this

Is this, as others have often said, a sign of the changing times, or is it an unnecessary inclusion in what is supposed to be a family program? Am I being prudish in my annoyance at the sex references? I worry I may be, but allow me to explain myself.

First up, I'm not saying Doctor Who needs to be 100% kid friendly. I quite enjoy when I see a masterfully crafted adult joke included in something that kids could watch and totally miss. There's a bunch of things I used to watch as a kid that going back as an adult I noticed contained some delightful gems that just flew straight over my younger self's head. However I do feel that many if not all of these innuendos are gratuitous or laboured. And why does all this innuendo seem to contain so many gay references?

A great example is in The Unicorn and The Wasp when The Doctor and Agatha Christie interview suspects. One them, Roger Eddison lies about their whereabouts because he was having it off with Davenport, one of the male servants. We know this because we are shown a long and blatant shot of Roger leading Davenport off into the woods. This in itself wouldn't that much of an issue if it was a major plot point. Instead it seems to boil down to, "look, they had gay people then too, but they had to lie about it!" which I feel is actually rather patronising.

It's not the gayness that annoys me, because even visualising the scene with Davenport replaced with a scullery maid, it still seems clumsy. Perhaps it's the lingering nature of the flashback, or perhaps it's just that the tryst adds nothing to the story. The 45 minute format is already constraining without wasting screen time like this.

Another major In-Who-Endo that had me palming face was during A Good Man Goes to War when Madame Vastra delivers the line, "I don't know why you put up with me," to Jenny before lashing out with her hyper-long tongue for a quite horrendous lesbian joke. Don't get me wrong, I love Vastra and Jenny, but that was just so over the top it hurt. It's like if that quip was made before a gay male character was shown to press a button from three feet away with a thrust of his hips, or save the day by sucking a golf ball through a garden hose.

By contrast the references to their relationship made in The Snowmen and it's prelude webisodes were much better. Rather than forcing in a crude sex joke, they played with the reactions of others by juxtaposing them with the frankness and normalcy with which Vastra treats the relationship. I particularly liked the line:

I resent your implication of impropriety. We are married.

Witty without being gratuitous and delivered wonderfully. Absolutely spot on for that kind of thing.

Many of River's flirtations with The Doctor are borderline too. She can get away with much of it because she's supposed to be a bit of a Vamp, but references to handcuffs are pushing things a bit for me. Jack Harkness' broad sexual appetites are an interesting commentary on the loosening of sexual morals and were not too gratuitously played (in Doctor Who at least), except for the time he implied fantasising about being the meat in a Doctor sandwich. These references are subtle and amusing, but are they necessary?

Can we fix it?

This is one of those tough ones, simply because it's hard to tell what's being included to make some kind of statement, and what's being included just because of changing degrees of normalcy. Some of the gay references in particular are subtle enough that if it wasn't for the gratuitous ones putting me on my guard, I likely wouldn't notice them. I seem to remember a passing reference to a same-sex wedding in (I think) The Power of Three which I probably wouldn't recall even that vaguely if I hadn't already been put in the frame of mind that whenever homosexuality is mentioned on the show I immediately think, "Not again."

I think those references don't need "fixing". Homosexual relationships should be represented in the same way as heterosexual ones. It's a sign of the times that we can now replace a straight couple with a gay one with little to no impact on the plot. The Fat One and The Thin One from A Good Man Goes to War are a reasonable (although not perfect) example. They could have been any kind of couple, but were a gay couple. Their sexuality was fairly inconsequential. The execution of that is another story, as they were rather clichéd gay guys, they were constantly reminding us they were married, and I had the sneaking suspicion they were some kind of political commentary, especially considering their connection to the Anglican Church.

That said, if the fact that a character's sexuality isn't integral to the plot, why mention it at all? I'm not a Torchwood fan (only seen one episode), but I imagine when Jack has more screen time his sexuality becomes just another character trait. His charm and willingness to crack on to anything is a tool writers could use to further the plot (again, I don't know if they did or not though). Roger and Davenport though? Not so much, in my opinion.

So if they were set on having Roger be gay and for The Doctor to instantly realise that was the reason behind his (quite obvious) lie during questioning, then the wandering off into the woods scene could have been a bit more subtle. The Doctor and Donna had already noticed his flirtations with Davenport earlier in the episode, so perhaps a glance at Davenport through the window during questioning would be enough, or a brief shot of them walking together as flashback before the Doctor gets a knowing look and moves things along.

A better solution (apart from cutting it altogether) would be if Roger's lie kept The Doctor and Agatha focused on him instead of the real killer until eventually they uncover his deception and switch focus. If it was only Donna who noticed Roger's interactions with Davenport earlier and she was busy investigating the house during questioning, she could be the one to explain it to The Doctor after he had wasted time trying to solve that little mystery. This would allow The Doctor to be seen as fallible, something which is desperately needed more and more these days.

So that was pretty rambling and convoluted, but what I'm getting at is that overt sex jokes are tacky and don't need to appear in a family show like Doctor Who. Forcing gay relationships into episodes is equally tacky, as it reeks of political posturing; showing how hip and PC the writers are. Sexual equality is important in shows that are accessible to younger audiences, as it helps to normalise all types of people and relationships. Overcompensation isn't helpful though, as it can make it seem like a joke of some kind.

So, if the writers are making someone gay, they need to ask themselves, "why does the audience need to know?" If their sexuality affects the plot, make sure it's in a significant way. If it doesn't, reference to their sexuality may not be required at all. If they want to include a sex joke (which shouldn't be very often), make it short and subtle. It should sail far over younger viewers heads and only be enough to cause adults to share a knowing look.

In the meantime, I look forward to a new Companion:

Ooooh, Matron!